Spoke too soon

So I spoke too soon. :( And on a perfectly good Thursday afternoon, I'm here at home working on homework because he has work.

I should have known that it was too good to be true that he wanted to spend time with me last night AND today. *le sigh* oh wellz.

Humm......Maybe if i finish early I can go to the beach and maybe work on my tan for a hour or so.

Contemplation on date

"I've heard it said that people come into our lives for a reason, bringing something we must learn and we are led to those who help us most to grow, if we let them and we help them in return" ~Anonymous

I found this quote while looking back and digging into some of my archives from my previous blog. I don't remember how I felt when I copied down this quote and pasted it in my post. However, now reading it...it means a whole new meaning for me. I love the fact that when I look back on my previous self and compare it to me today, I am still able to to see bits and pieces of myself--for staying the same; I think I'm glad to a certain extent.

Anyways, on this so called date person I had gone on a couple dates with stopped contacting me since our last (3rd date). He says that he thinks I'm infatuated by him, but I was too lazy to correct him...so I guess this is why he isn't calling. Maybe he is afraid that I will cling on to him like an octopus and be like one of those girls. Hum...I wonder if I give off that vibe. It is all very interesting. So I guess that is that. Whilst I would not be honest if I said I didn't care at all (it sort of bothers me that people can be so rude...so much for honesty), at the same time I don't think I felt much other than a little bit of possible attraction and flattery at the comments that he gives me....oh fine... and the kisses were nice too. But at the end of the day, he barely knows me so how would I be obsessed with a guy I hardly know and vice versa.

Again. VERY interesting. Aii, I just hope I will find out the reason; I don't need the relationship to work...but truthfully, it bothers the crap out of me of not knowing.

Contemplation in wee hours of the morning

Life's twist and turns will never turn out how one would like to. Especially in the area of love, or potential love relationships. Giving oneself out to another not knowing what the other person would do with your fragile heart is indeed a scary thing. I think I need to learn not to always place my heart on a platter and offer it out. But at the same time, shouldn't the thing that they say that one should always give it all and bet on that moment of the possibility that the other person will reciprocate be considered as another option too? I think my whole life will be in a process of constant learning and bruising of trying to find the right person and share my life with that particular right person.