Friday, August 24, 2012

Cliff Jumping

At the moment, things are a bit stagnant.  I'm coming down from a big high, and I'm finding myself a bit antsy.  This past Sunday, I finished my running goals of 2012.

Running Goals for 2012
·      Run Carlsbad Half Marathon (Jan 22)
·      Run a Warrior Dash (Mar 31)
·      Run La Jolla Half Marathon (Apr 29)
·      Run AFC Half Marathon (Aug 19)
·      Get Triple Crown 2012 medal
·      Volunteer at SD Rock n Roll Marathon

I'm proud, and quite tickled that I actually finished what I listed above (and an 10k) all in one calendar year!  However, just thinking about what lays ahead scares the bezeheesus out of me.  

Quitting one's job while living off on savings in this financial environment literally feels like jumping off a cliff.  Only this time, there is no idea when or where impact with the bottom will occur; or somehow miraculously, one will gain a pair of wings mid fall.  So far, the fall is still on going.  I feel like I might as well embrace it and not struggle too much, perhaps that will give me enough thinking space to actually figure something out.

Perhaps...if I can stop flailing long enough.

Tuesday, August 7, 2012

As the Heart Is

On the life front:

These past couple months have been a roller coaster of events and emotions.  In January, I made up my mind to finally quit my job and move home to study for the GMAT at the end of August.  No job, no income, leave my friends and life here in SD, go home and study.  Simple no?

Alas, things in life are never easy and never go as planned.  Little did I know, March came and brought along a boy (W.) that would steal my heart away and be almost* everything I wished for in a boyfriend.

I knew I was doomed when April, May, and June passed and the more we felt like friends and lovers that have known each other for most of our lives, and yet, just met.  Late June, and early July, we went on a 20+hour road trip to visit his friends and family, and came back with a much deeper appreciation for one another.

Crap. Was the only thought going through my head when in mid July, I was watching August fast approaching on the horizon, knowing that I had to make a decision fast and soon about leaving San Diego.  From the beginning, my parents haven't really approved of this relationship - why?  Because he was of another ethnicity than I was.  I saw a side of my parents that I never thought (believed) they had - racist.  They admit it and are reluctant to budge.  Even the thought of wanting to introduce the boy to the family was met with rejection and disdain.  Sigh.  Keeping this reaction of my parents in mind, I knew there would be no way I'd be able to move home and continue this relationship**.

After quite a few sleepless nights, I decided to still quit my current job, but stay in San Diego for the time being and study here instead.  Yes, I'd be living off of my savings for a few months, but that is a small price to pay for independence and the freedom to see where this relationship would go.  And perhaps, in the mean time, find another job that is slightly less demanding and would allow me an opportunity to be able to enjoy life and prepare myself for the next stage of life.  I can't stay a lab tech forever!

I gave a month's notice last Friday.  My boss was surprisingly supportive and told me that I should go home and think again of my options; she was willing to let me work part time if it came to it.  I told her I would meet again with her in a week and give her my answer.

On the running front:

Oh gawds, the last time I ran was when I was visiting W.'s family in early July.  Since then due to family drama, tired of running, and the stress of making all these big life decisions I have been completely out of commission on the running front.

I have a half marathon coming up in 12 days, with a time limit of 3 hours.  Fudge.   I finally dragged my sorry butt out for a 1 miler since I wasn't quite sure how far I'd be able to make - 11:24 was my time.  Not too shabby I suppose for a month+ hiatus.  Tomorrow, I will be trying for 2 miles.  Wish me luck!

On blogging front:

I will definitely start to update more, now that big things have died down a bit I will be gearing up for studying mode - any type of procrastination is welcomed, right?  Oh dear.

*He is mostly perfect, however still gotta work on a couple things no?  Life is good, but it ain't THAT GOOD.  ;)

**I hope in time, they will eventually accept and see him for him, and not his skin color or heritage background if this relationship does progress in the direction that both W. and I want to see it go.


This site's main theme more so stems from "Grace Kelly" by Mika. There is absolutely no association with Grace Kelly the actress. I only wish I could have 1/2 the grace she possesses on screen. *sighs*